Chip and Dale's Rescue Rangers
"I Dream of Fat Cat"
Written by Michael Gibby

Characters herein are © Walt Disney corporation. Distribute freely, but do not modify.

(Scene opens in an auditorium.  There is a large podium with red,
white, and blue banners in the middle of the stage.  A gentleman
in a tuxedo and top hat steps up to the podium.)

     Gentleman : Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Nobel Prize
          Ceremony.   Our first recipient has made several
          contributions in the fields of technology and law
          enforcement.  There are many policemen who owe
          their lives to her and don't even know it.  She
          has helped to thwart many criminal exploits and,
          in so doing, has created many things out of pure
          necessity.  Please welcome the first mouse to
          receive a Nobel Prize, Miss Gadget Hackwrench.

(The audience gives a large round of applause.  Gadget, wearing a
formal evening gown, steps up to the podium and climbs up the
microphone cord.  She then tilts the mic toward herself.)

     Gadget : Thank you for this warm welcome.  I'd like to thank
          all the people who helped me earn this award, including
          Sergeant Spinelli, Officers Muldoon and Kirbich, and
          the entire police force.  I'd especially like to thank
          my friends, without whom I never would have left my
          workshop, the Rescue Rangers: Chip, Dale, Monterey
          Jack, and Zipper.  Come on up here, guys!

(The other Rangers are sitting in a front row seat.  They get out
of the chair and climb up to where Gadget is.  They all take bows
while the audience applauds them.  Everything gets wavy as the
scene shifts to Gadget's bedroom.  She is asleep and has a smile
on her face.  This has all been a dream.)

(Scene shifts to Fat Cat's office.  He and his cronies are
watching the end of Gadget's dream on a television set that is
hooked up to an elaborate computer.)

     Fat Cat : It works!  Thanks to this gizmo, I'll be able to
          control the dreams of all those Refuse Rangers.  Just
          imagine, sending those miserable rodents to an asylum
          by driving them mad in their dreams.

     Mepps : Boss, how come you're givin' 'em good dreams?  That
          doesn't sound very scary to me.

     Mole : Yeah, why didn't you give her a nightmare?

(Fat Cat hits them both on the head.)

     Fat Cat : You idiots!  If I had given her a nightmare, she
          would have awoke.  Then we wouldn't be able to see if
          this Dream Machine works.

     Wart : But how are you going to make them crazy with their
          own dreams?

     Fat Cat : Must I explain everything to you simpletons? 
          Everyone knows that when you don't get enough sleep,
          you start acting strange.  If all they have for days
          are nightmares, then they'll be afraid to go to sleep. 
          Therefore, they won't get enough sleep and will soon go
          completely mad.

     Snout : One more question, boss.  How do you know where to
          send the nightmares if you don't know where they live?

     Fat Cat : Simple, just like you.  We already know that they
          live somewhere in the park.  I just send the signal in
          that direction and bingo!  Instant nightmare.

(Fat Cat starts laughing and stops after a while.)

     Fat Cat : I don't hear you laughing.

(Fat Cat starts laughing again, then his cronies join him, albeit

(Scene shifts to Gadget's workshop.  Gadget is working on what
looks like a cross between a satellite dish and some radar
equipment.  There is a cap with electrodes nearby.  Dale walks
into the room from a nearby hallway.)

     Dale : Good morning, Gadget.  What're you doing?

     Gadget : I'm building a solar powered, non-radioactive,
          ultra-sensitive energy detector.

     Dale : That's wonderful, stupendous, and down right    
          fascinating.  Uh, what's it do?

(Gadget finishes the machine.)

     Gadget : Simply put, it shows how much energy it receives,
          what kind it is, and when it was received.  This way,
          we can tell just how much sunlight we get at any given

(Dale points to the cap.)

     Dale : And what's this for?

     Gadget : It's designed to pick up brainwaves while I sleep. 
          And if I hook up a printer, it can tell when and what
          kind of dream I had.

     Dale : You mean it only works on you?

     Gadget : Yep.  It's custom fit to my head and my brainwaves.
          You see, every species has its own brainwaves.  If I
          tried it on Fat Cat, I wouldn't get an accurate reading
          because cat brainwaves are different from mouse   
          brainwaves.  And the cap just wouldn't fit on Monty's  

     Dale : Why did you decide to build it?  Just one of those
          times where you get bored and decided to build    

     Gadget : Well, yes and no.  I just decided to build the
          energy detector, but the dream reader was different. 
          Last night, I dreamt that I won the Nobel Prize.  Of
          course, no mouse would ever win that, and I hadn't
          eaten anything unusual yesterday, so I thought that
          something else was wrong.

     Dale : You know, I had a pretty good dream last night, too. 
          I hit the winning homer at the World Series.  I almost
          forgot.  Monty wanted me to bring you in for breakfast.
          He probably thinks I've disappeared in here, never to
          be seen again.

     Gadget : Okay, but could you help me bring the energy  
          detector outside first?

     Dale : Sure thing.  I guess Monty could wait a while longer.

(Dale and Gadget pick up the energy detector and carry it out the

(Scene shifts to the kitchen of R.R.H.Q.  Monty, Chip, and Zipper
are waiting at the table.)

     Chip : What are we waiting for?  I'm so hungry I could eat
          an elephant.

     Monty : Gadget must have been working on something that got
          Dale interested.  We may never see them again.

     Chip : Looks like you spoke too soon.

(Gadget and Dale walk past the door with the energy detector.)

     Gadget : Don't mind us, just go ahead and start eating.

(Gadget and Dale keep heading toward the door, while the others
start eating breakfast.  They return momentarily.)

     Chip : What was that thing you were carrying?

     Gadget : An energy detector designed to tell how much, what
          kind, and time of any energy form.  It's hooked up and
          working now.

(Gadget and Dale start eating.  Gadget stops for a moment.)

     Gadget : Just out of curiosity, did anyone have a dream last

     Monty : Yeah, I dreamed I was scaling a mountain of brie

(Monty has a mild cheese attack.)

     Chip : I dreamt that I put the ten most wanted criminals
          behind bars in one week.

     Gadget : That's strange.  Everyone had a great dream, but
          they were all nearly impossible.  I won the Nobel
          Prize, and Dale won the World Series.

(The rest of the day passes and the next day is half over.  Scene
shifts to inside Fat Cat's headquarters.  The Rangers are all
chained to a wall, dungeon-style.  Fat Cat is pacing in front of

     Fat Cat : This will be the last time you rodents will bother
          me.  Every time I capture you, I let someone or   
          something else do my dirty work.  And every time I     
          let someone or something else do my dirty work, you
          escape.  Not this time.  But where to begin?

(Fat Cat unsheathes his claws and walks over to Monty.)

     Fat Cat : Shall we say, "Age before beauty?"

(Fat Cat walks over to Dale.)

     Fat Cat : Or start with the lowest I.Q.

(Fat Cat walks over to Chip.)

     Fat Cat : Shall we play Follow the Leader?

(Fat Cat walks over to Zipper.)

     Fat Cat : Or maybe start small and work our way up.

(Fat Cat resumes pacing.)

     Fat Cat : No, I've always prided myself in being a     

(Fat Cat stops in front of Gadget.)

     Fat Cat : ... so, we'll go ladies first!

(Fat Cat raises his arm and swipes at Gadget.  When the claws are
inches from her throat, scene quickly shifts to Gadget's bedroom. 
She sits up in bed with a cold sweat on her face.  She is wearing
her dream reader.  She removes it and tears the paper out of a
printer that it is hooked up to.  She then runs outside to her
energy detector and compares the patterns on the printouts, which
are identical.  The others come outside in their pajamas, all
slightly shaken.)

     Gadget : I knew it!  The patterns are identical.

     Monty : What are you talking about?

(Gadget tears the printout from the energy detector and shows
both to the others.)

     Gadget : Let me guess, you all just woke up from a bad
          dream, right?

     Monty : Me mountain of cheese turned into a pile of cats.

     Chip : The ten most wanted broke out and nearly killed me.

     Dale : The losing team almost sent me over the wall.

     Gadget : And the podium at the awards ceremony turned into
          Fat Cat and captured us all.  It all fits.  These are
          from the energy detector and my dream reader.  Both
          patterns show neural energy at about 1:34 this morning.

     Dale : So?

     Chip : I get it!  Neural means "of the brain," and we all
          had nightmares just now.  Someone must have figured out
          how to induce dreams, good or bad.

     Gadget : And who would have a reason for giving us
          nightmares on purpose?

     Others : Fat Cat.

     Dale : But why would he give us good dreams first?

     Monty : He must've been testing his machine and needed us to
          stay asleep.

     Chip : Well, let's get over to his hideout and check it out.

     All : Rescue Rangers, away!

(The Rangers pile into the Ranger Plane and take off.  They turn
around and come back.)

     Chip : Maybe we should get out of our pajamas first.

(They go back inside and return momentarily, fully dressed.)

     All : Rescue Rangers, away!

(The Rangers pile into the Ranger Plane and take off.)

     Dale : Whoa, deja vu!

(Scene shifts to the airspace near the Happy Tom Cat Food
Factory.  Gadget, obviously tired, is having trouble staying
awake and in control of the Ranger Plane.)

     Chip : Hey, Gadget, wake up!  We need you on your toes so we
          can stop Fat Cat.

     Gadget : I'm sorry, Chip.  I just didn't get enough sleep

     Dale : Here, Gadget.  Take one of these.

(Dale hands Gadget a pill.)

     Gadget : No way, Dale.  I may be tired, but I'm not stupid. 
          I know what those things can do to you.

(Gadget gives the pill back to Dale.)

     Dale : What do you mean?  I've been taking them for three
          months and nothing has happened to me.

     Chip : Three months?  What happens if you don't take one?

     Dale : I have trouble staying awake when I need to.

(Dale yawns, then pops the pill down his throat.  He wakes up
almost instantly.)

     Gadget : Anything that works that fast can't be good for
          your health.

     Dale : It's okay.  They only last for about an hour, and I'm
          usually wide awake by then.

     Monty : I'd listen to them, Dale.  Why, I once saw a bloke
          who was so hooked on pep pills that he had to take them
          every half hour.  If he didn't he'd fall flat on his

     Gadget : Coming up on the factory now.  I hope that pill
          doesn't wear off before we can stop Fat Cat.

     Dale : Don't worry.  If it does, I have a spare in my  

(Gadget lands the Ranger Plane on the roof of Fat Cat's office. 
The Rangers climb out of the plane and look down through the
skylight.  Fat Cat and his henchmen are discussing the dreams.)

     Wart : Did you see that fat one's?  He was so scared he
          could hardly move.

     Mepps : Yeah, I'll never forget the look on his face when
          his "Chu-heeze-uh" turned into "C-C-Cats!"

     Mole : I liked the one with the baseball team.

     Wart : Why?

     Mole : 'Cause there's nothing like seeing a chipmunk hit
          over the left field wall.

(The henchmen start laughing again.)

     Snout : What was your favorite, boss?

     Fat Cat : It would have to be that mechanic's.  It gives me
          an idea about how to deal with them next time.  I could
          very well become the "do-it-yourself" type.

(Scene shifts back up to the roof.)

     Chip : What kind of "idea" could Fat Cat have got from your
          dream, Gadget?

     Gadget : He had us all chained to a wall and nearly put one
          of his claws through my neck.

(Scene shifts back to Fat Cat's office.)

     Snout : How come we didn't get to see the end of their

     Mole : Yeah, I'd have loved to have seen your "shish-ka-

     Fat Cat : They must have woke up because of the intensity of
          their dreams.  After all, they were life-threatening. 
          Next time, I'll tone it down a little.

(Scene shifts back up to the roof.  Dale is starting to look

     Dale : I don't feel good.

     Chip : I thought you said that pill would last an hour.

     Gadget : He must have built up a resistance to them.  He
          needs more pills to get the same effect.

(Dale pops the other pill in his mouth, but to no good.  He falls
asleep and crashes through the skylight.)

(Scene shifts back to Fat Cat's office.  He has his hand on the
intensity knob on the dream machine when Dale lands on him,
causing the knob to be turned all the way to "overload.")

     Fat Cat : How did he get in here?

(Wart points to the skylight.  Fat Cat looks up and sees the
other Rangers. They see him look at them and duck back behind the
frame. Fat Cat picks up Dale.)

     Fat Cat : Don't just stand there, get them!

(Fat Cat and his henchmen chase after the Rangers.  The chase
leads up to the roof, where Fat Cat pins them by a ledge. He
trips and Dale rolls out of his hands and up to the Ranger's
feet.  Fat Cat picks himself up.  His henchmen soon join him.)

     Fat Cat : You bothersome pests have interfered with my plans
          for the last time.  You friend's dream gave me an idea,
          so I'm going to take care of you myself.

(Scene shifts to a cross section of Fat Cat's office and where he
is standing.  It turns out that he is standing directly above the
dream machine, which goes into overload and explodes, sending the
bad guys up into the air.  All this commotion wakes up Dale.)

     Dale : Good morning.  Did I miss anything?

(Scene shifts to high in the air.  Fat Cat and his cronies are
coming towards the camera.  Camera pans along their trajectory,
which lands them in a dog pound.  Growling and barking is heard
over the fence, and the bad guys come out bruised and battered.)

(Scene shifts back to the roof of the Happy Tom Cat Food Factory. 
The Rangers are getting back in the Ranger Plane.)

     Gadget : I hope you learned your lesson, Dale.

     Dale : I'll say.  I'm gonna double the dosage now.

(Chip hits him on the head.)

     Chip : You dummy.  Pretty soon you'll have to double it
          again and again and again.

     Gadget : It's not that hard to get addicted to something, so
          you have to learn to...

     Dale : I know, I know.  Just say "No."